Pastor (Mrs.) Folu Adeboye in this intervew speaks on her pet project, Wholistic Outreach, the role of Pastors wives in the church of God, her experiences as a pastor, pastor's wife and the wife of a General Overseer. She also assessed her husband, Enoch Adeboye whom she referred to as a responsible man, an adjective she said cant be used for so many men of God. Excerpts.

What informed your setting up of Wholistic Outreach?
The purpose behind Wholistic Outreach is just passion and compassion. Going out into the streets and seeing how many youths are hawking bread, pure water, fruits and all kinds of things is disheartening. We are almost at a time now when all the children are out of school on holidays. You will see them in their thousands.

As a mother; even when it is not holiday time and you see all these boys on the road, sometimes they give out their goods and start running to collect the money. Some have lost their lives in the process. Some have lost their health. Some, you see them running with one of the pair of slippers and by the time they go back to pick the second one, they get knocked down by vehicles. I've been thinking-now can we help these ones? They can be better.

There was a time I met one of my daughters in the Lord who works at the University of Lagos. I asked her to help me design a curriculum whereby all these ones can be brought in. We'll have a settlement for them, and their own lectures will be varied. Obviously, some have dropped out of school because of lack of finance; so if they go to classes in the morning. They can sell their wares in the afternoon. At least, we can pick them up from wherever they have stopped and give them education.

If they go to school in the morning, they will go and do manual labour in the afternoon: They can work in the camp and take meager salary. In the evening, they return to the class­room. Thereby, they will, at least, have their school certificate. From there they can become what God wants them to be.

But the logistics behind it is a lot of work. I have to get people who will be there on the spot. I won't always be available. I can set it up and stay there for the first one month; then others will continue. But so many things are involved; at least, cash is involved. If they have the money to pay their school fees, they will not be doing what they are doing. So, that is the first goal. Secondly, when we look at how many Nigerians are harlots at home and abroad, it is alarming. This means our moral standard is breaking down.

Thirdly, the fear of God is no longer reigning supreme in the hearts of those children: Then, the training from the parent's side is weak. Whatever it is in those days, your parents may not be rich, but that doesn't make you take to prostitution. If they were going to the farm, you would follow them.

Like me now, I know how to farm. There is hardly anything that anybody can say about farming that I don't know. Yet, my father was a teacher. Since there is no longer proper training, these children just behave anyhow. They are so loose, such that some will leave home one week, two weeks, they are not back, yet the parents will be at office. Where as in those days, even as an adult there is nothing that will make you stay out­side till 8pm-9pm. Your parents will ask - where are you coming from? Yoruba adage says, "Eni a bi ire ki i rin ru. (Those who are well-trained do not walk at night).

I think I would have covered more grounds in serving God and humanity. I know that God's plans for me are greater than where I am now. But he has promised to help me arrive at my expected end. My greatest desire and prayer is to be closer to him daily.

These laxities are too much. It has turned most of our young girls to be harlots because they move in bad company. Many of them don't want to do it but because of pressure, they yield. They want to wear some Kind of clothes, even when they don't have the money. And the boys take them cheap; for Nl00, they can go.

So, as I was thinking about it, I had these two plans. Okay - to rehabilitate and educate those ones who are hawking and those ones that suddenly turned themselves to harlots. I thought of how to help them. Along the line, Sister Eniabitobi came in and we were just talking. Then she said "Ah, I too have the same passion" I said, "Ok my hands are full I have so many things I'm doing for the Lord.

You do the running around And since we can't do anything without being under the auspices of the RCCG, where we belong we had to consult with the church. The provincial pastor at the headquarters church then, Pastor Odeyemi, took it up and was interested in the programme. Even after he left, the next pastor who came in, Pastor Daramola and the wife also took it up.

We started doing this work little by little, seeing how to get people to together. Sister Eniabitobi got some people together and with her, they started evangelism to the hotels and brothels where prostitutes are. They are reaching out to God's Daughters as we call them. That was the beginning of Wholistic Outreach.

How old is the outreach now?
Just two years.

You talked about rebuilding the youths on the streets. Are you thinking of a vocational outfit where they can get skill acquisition?
Yes, that was what I had in mind initially. The plan is still there, but I have so many things in my mouth that I'm chewing. I don't believe in doing anything half-heartedly. It will be one after the other. The curriculum is already down but until we have settled some things, we can't do much. So, very soon we will be talking about Youth Rehabilitation Centre.

To what extent has the Wholistic team been able to evangelise these girls and get them out of prostitution?
It's a process that involves patience and the wisdom from the Almighty God through divine intervention because we know the devil is holding them. There is a stronghold in their lives. For it to be broken, they need to know who Jesus is. That's why it has to start with evangelism - which they are doing. We have designed Bible study for them and for now, we have eight ladies and eight babies in the home. Two other girls are coming in this week.

It's not so easy to get them out of the trade but we have to really pull them, monitor them and make sure they don't go back. That is a great work. People have to be in the home. It took a long time before we would get the home we use at the moment in Ikorodu and it took a lot from us to make it conducive.

It requires a lot of money to run such an outfit. Every month, they have to feed the people. Those who have children, we have to put them in school and their school fees. We don't know their fathers, neither do the girls know the fathers of those babies. They are fatherless. And for the girls too, rehabilitating them spiritually requires a lot.

Speaking about their-physical wellbeing, we have to consider which skill they can acquire. So we ask them- "do you want to go back to school or learn a trade?" There is one that has just put to bed. She was seventeen years old and her pregnancy was about seven months when she came in. Now, she has put to bed. We have to go and look for her parents. The parents are based in Abuja and have been looking for her for the past six years. When the mother saw her, it was like, "So you're still alive?" The mother was very happy that there is an organisation like this which helps her daughter. She is back in school.

The mother has taken the baby. We have so many mothers like that. It requires patience and God's intervention to reach to the hearts of these people and get them convinced that they have sinned but God is ready to take them back and make their lives beautiful if they repent.

That of the pastor's wife is different from the General Overseer's wife. The challenges of a pastor's wife are minimal compared to that of the General Overseer's wife.

The general trend in most churches is for the pastor's wife to focus more on the children and women arm of the church. From your own wealth of experience, what should be the role of a pastor's wife in her husband's ministry?
There are several factors that determine the extent of a woman's role in her husband's ministry. The woman herself - who is she? If God directs her, she will be able to know her scope of operation at one point or the other. First and foremost, she is a mate for her husband, she is there to help. That is her primary assignment. And when we talk about help, it varies, depending on the ability of that woman.

There are some women who want to do some things but can't do it either because of their health, their revel of exposure or the environment of that ministry. If it's a place where they tie the hands of the women at the back, she may not be able to do much.

Secondly, the woman has to discern what God has for her, the kind of work which God has given to her. If she knows, she will be able to operate in that.

Thirdly, after settling that she is not only a helpmate for the man but she also has a gift, then we have to ask - is she allowed? She may have ten thousand things she can do for the Lord but she may not be allowed.

If she has the support of the ministry and that of her husband, together with that of the heavenly Father, there is no limit to what she can do. But in some assemblies, women are not allowed to do some things. Up till today, some people are still fighting whether or not women should preach in churches when the Bible says that we have the same Holy Spirit. Whether Jews or Gentiles, men or women, the Holy Spirit is the same for everybody.

On the day of Pentecost, one hundred and twenty people were in the upper room. Women were there too. So, if they received the same Spirit as the men, why can't they do the same work as the men? We have read about Priscilla and Acquilla, we have read about Deborah who governed and judged the whole of Israel for about forty years. As a judge, she was still a wife of Lapidoth and led the whole army to war. God is not a liar. Going by biblical blueprints therefore, I think our leaders should come to appreciate and admit that God can use women too.

For how long have you been in the office of a Pastor's wife?
Since my husband became a pastor. That was in 1978.

I once heard you say that for several years, you were at the background. Was it your own making or were you compelled to do so? When and how did you finally come into limelight?
I didn't even want to be known but when God's time came, He made me known. God's time matters a lot. Some of these young ones that want to take the microphone from their husbands and dominate, it's because they are young. They are not yet matured. They don't know that before you can come to the open, you must first be in the incubator and be properly groomed spiritually and otherwise. Those years, I had to learn. Even now, I am still learning.

As a pastor's wife, would you want to share with us some of the challenges of your office?
That of the pastor's wife is different from the General Overseer's wife. The challenges of a pastor's wife are minimal compared to that of the General Overseer's wife.

Then, I want to know that of the General Overseer's wife?
It's a lot, but I think the first is the challenges of how the husband will make it and not disappoint God. That is the greatest aspect of the challenge. This means she is to support her husband wholeheartedly. She can't just allow the devil to play pranks between her and her husband. She must be a friend and supporter whereby even after the husband has faced some Challenges outside, there will be somebody at home whom he will be able to unwind with and can pray to her. But if she were the type that is always fighting him, where would the man go to? So, the first challenge is that she just has to be there for the man.

Secondly, she should know that the women in the ministry are in her care. She is the first lady, as call it in America . She is the first in that ministry. For everybody who misbehaves in that ministry, they will go to her and ask - what is their mother advising them? Over here, when my husband sees any lady misbehaving. Maybe she wore something not presentable, he pinch me and ask, "What are you doing with these women? Then I will say, if she is my daughter she will look at me and behave as behave." ­

So, for everyone that has to be a General Overseer's wife, she has a lot. As a mother, she won't say that she doesn't see the youths or have no interest in them. Even though, we have youth leaders in charge, she has to come in once in a while because she too has youths under her roof. She must not close her eyes to the pregnant women or the single ladies who are always weeping and writing letters. "Please, I got this child by mistake while in the secondary school. Now, I need a husband and I must have one. Pray that I get a husband."

Like I received a letter just yesterday night by express mail. The lady said, "Mama, the other time you were praying for me on the phone, you said I would get a husband. Now, this is my situation." And when I read about the situation, it was pathetic. I didn't know what else to tell her. She said, "I must come and see you now. I can no longer wait"

You know as a leader's wife, you just have to operate in one ministry or the other. Sometimes, you will be a doctor, a counselor, a teacher, a guardian, etc. Sometimes, you will have to take some children into your home. The mother may say, “Mama, we give you this child. We can't do anything because the child has said, "I will go and kill myself." You have to be there to say, "You can't kill yourself. God wants you alive. Why should you die when you can live and succeed? So, for a week or two, you have to be there to mentor him and take him in.

Have you had cause to take such children into your home?
Of course! I have accommodated many of them

But some pastors' wives are scared that such children may be possessed of evil spirits.
That is why you need the Spirit of God. Of course, you can't take everybody's child home. We have people around who can be counselors or help at one time or the other. But there are some, who, maybe because of the level of relationship with their parent may be the mother has been long in the church or is a long-term widow, you know that the woman needs assistance, you just have to come in. Like I have about two living with me now

As the closest person to Pastor Enoch Adejare Adeboye, how would you describe him?
Let me ask you first - how would you describe him?

It's a lot, but I think the first is the challenges of how the husband will make it and not disappoint God. That is the greatest aspect of the challenge. This means she is to support her husband wholeheartedly. She can't just allow the devil to play pranks between her and her husband.

I will describe him as unassuming, humble, loving and large-hearted.
That's the same way I'll describe him. But much more, he is a responsible man. I am aware that many men are not responsible, even preachers and men of God. He is a responsible husband and father. He takes good care of his family.

What do you consider as your greatest achievements so far?
I don't know. I don't think I have achieved so much for now. Until I lay my crown at the feet of Jesus on the last day, I cannot appraise myself adequately. Then, my Saviour will let me know what I have done and how well I have fared. Until then, there is no looking back. I must do more.

If you were to relive your life, what would you like to change?
I think I would have covered more grounds in serving God and humanity. I know that God's plans for me are greater than where I am now. But he has promised to help me arrive at my expected end. My greatest desire and prayer is to be closer to him daily.

What do you hope to achieve for Wholistic Outreach within the next ten years if Jesus tarries?
It is as God leads me. If I have the Opportunity apart from Wholistic Outreach, I want t" help those boys in the streets. I believe that every Nigerian eye must be opened. The Wholistic Ministry cannot cover all the areas where we have these harlots and street girls. I want to sell this vision to all the gospel churches so they can do something to help them.

The Bible says righteousness exalts a nation. If we believe this, then accept that many of them don't have good parenting, they can be helped if we set our hearts to do it. That is another area where Nigeria is failing. We are careless about parenting and this is pulling us down. Children are no longer humble; they don't respect authority. If they regard constituted authorities, how come they take laws into their hands and destroy university properties. We see them setting palaces on fire (although I'm not supporting anybody who does anything evil).

It is most undesirable. These entire lapses come from the family. When you see how some children talk to their parents, you cannot but wonder at their guts. They no longer fear God, not to talk of their parents. In our own time, you dare not look your parents in the face.

 

 

 

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