Pastor (Mrs.) Connie Madubuko is the wife of Apostle Anselm Madubuko who turns 50 years on July 25, 2008. A woman with great influence on the family of Christ. Who went through thick and thin to ensure that her husband's ministry took root. She is a mother of three children. In this interview, she spoke about her background, family and ministry. Excerpts from an interview culled from The Gospel Fore Runner.

How can you describe Apostle Anselm as a husband, man of God and of course father of your kids?
There are two things entirely. When it comes to the work of God. He is a man that is very passionate in the things of God. The scripture that says seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness fits him because sees the work of God before every other thing. Before his family, before his parents and friends. When it comes to the work of the ministry, he tries to balance his family life with the ministry work, I help him to do that because if you leave him he would go all the way and forget that he has a family. This is to show you the love he has for the Lord. And one thing I know about him is that when he sets out to do something, he does it well; he does it with all his heart, he does it with everything that he has, and he does not mince words.
He is a good father. When it comes to the children, he does what a man is supposed to do. He pays their fees, he looks after their welfare, knows what they are doing in school. We just came back from Canada. We went to spend time with the children .We all gathered, and they are all in different States. We gathered at young Anselm's house and we spent about a week together, shared the Word. He is a good father, he is trying, nobody is perfect. But by the grace of God he is been able to bring the family together. He spends most of his time with the children apart from his prayer times. His love for the children does not conflict with the church work. And his work with the church does not disturb our marriage. Once it is something to do with the ministry, I am also there, hundred percent. I am not doing it half-heartedly. I am doing it from my heart. It is now a lifestyle because there is nothing else I see myself doing or I will see myself doing. So it also helps him to be able to focus on the ministry work. He is someone who listens even though at times when I tell him some things he will disagree as a man, but you know I take it up in prayer and God knocks him back to the line. It thank God for His grace.

What has been your practical experience as a helper to Apostle Anselm Madubuko both at home and in the ministry?
As a helper, because God has called men to be the head, I am talking generally now. Sometimes, you want to point out certain things to them and they feel they are the spiritual head and that you should allow them to do what they want to do. At fIrst I will 'fIght' and say, "you must do it this way". But as time went on, I started realizing that you cannot change a man only the Spirit of God can do that.
I thank God for the grace He gave me the moment I started putting it into practice. You see nobody is perfect, at times one will want to derail, not purposely, but whenever I told him he would not listen, I just go into prayers. And what he saId he would not do, he will do, because I would not naturally say don't do it because, I might be wrong. Probably he wants to ask somebody to go in the ministry, and as a mother I will say baby,

why don't you give some room, he will say no no baby I think I have had enough of this. And you know he is a man that listens. Pastor has listening ears. If you are talking to him he would listen, but at the end, he would say no, no baby, then he goes on and on saying baby I will not . Prayer works. And when I pray I believe God will answer and God has been so faithful. He will come and say okay baby, let's just leave him. So most times he listens and most times when he doesn't listen I feel bad, but there is nothing I can do. But one thing I have known that God has helped me by His spirit is to know that a man is a man. No matter what you have attained in life and you are living under a man, you must respect his views. I didn't know that at first. But when I started practicing that, things fell into place. He misses it sometimes, he is not perfect for it is by the grace of God. I have been able to over look some things. Pastor and I are friends, we are husband and wife, he is like my father, I am like his mother, we are very close. But when people look at us from the outside, they don't understand that. We discuss a lot, we share our experiences a lot, we chat, we help each other financially and otherwise.

Not like those days, we understand each other more now, I am calm now. I give God all the glory. He knows me more and I know him more. And he can always tell the next thing I want to do and I always know what he wants to do next. It has gotten to that point .We now know how to balance things and we don't have frictions anymore. It has been nice and wonderful.

When he is away how do you cope with the ministry, you know the ministry is big now?
I know it is not easy. I was sharing with a group that came to interview me. The bible says he knew me in my mother's womb. I am from a well to do home. We had house helps, cooks, we had everything. But I was the industrious type. We had a woman living in the next compound. Her daughter Virginia was my friend, and the woman used to make pap (Ogi) and fry garri. I find that I was always going there to help her sell the pap. I will make pap, fry garri, if you see the marks are still there. At 12 I didn't know that God was preparing me for the task ahead. But it is now that I am looking back to see that it was God. When I come back from this woman's place, my father will beat the hell out of me. Ehn daughter of a rich man. But I did not see it that way. I saw it as if I wanted to do what they were doing. Even though we were living in a big house and they were living in my father's compound, two rooms. My father will beat me. It was there I learnt how to squeeze bitter leaf and remove the water and all that. After beating me, I will still sneak out the next day and sell pap and sell oil with them.
She used to make palm oil. We will cook the palm fruit, remove the oil etc. So I learnt a lot from them. After teaching me, I will come home and my father will beat me. I will say okay papa I am sorry, tomorrow again, I will go. But you see I was being disobedient, but I am sure that God allowed such disobedience because it made me stronger and taught me a lot of things about life. That life is not just about wealth, life is not about wearing socks to school. And then whenever my sisters were going to school I will stay at home and do the house chores and my mother will say we have house help, I will say no.
At the age of 12, I started cooking. They, my siblings, will wake up in the morning and say, Amaka, because my name is Uzoamaka, what shall we eat today? I will go with the house help to cook.By 15-16, I could pound yam that four people could eat. So hey started calling me soldier, because i became so strong that I wanted to work all the time.
I did not know that God was preparing me for the ministry.As I was growing up, I wanted to have a home. One, because I saw how Mama Virginia was working and taking care of the of her children and all.nd I thank God that I met Daddy and got married to him and God called us to the ministry.

What is your appraisal of Apostle Anselm Madubuko?
When God calls a man, you cannot stop him. First of all, as a minister, once you are married to a pastor, you know that you are not just married to the man alone. That the man is sent out to the people. So you have to share him, not sexually but physically especially when it comes to the work of God.
I tell you, it is just God, it is not me, I am not trying to praise myself but I am trying to say that God has been so faithful. That throughout these years, when we started the ministry, I have never for once held his dress and said baby who is this girl". It has never crossed my mind.
Because I had always known that this man is a man for the people. And I know him that he does not misbehave. He respects me. He gives me my due respect as a wife, takes care of the home. He does not like going out, if it wasn't for this ministry, because we have a little sitting room where we stay, gossip, play, chat, you know and everything. So if he travels anytime, the only thing I don't like is when he does not rest. That is the only question mark. The only thing I have against him at times. I always tell him when he travels to take out time to rest.

Don't just preach 20 days at a stretch. That is the only thing I have against him. I always say, I don't dislike you traveling every time, going up and down, but you have to rest. Because this body also need rest. I do miss him when he is not around, but I am busy too.
Like now, I am renovating the altar trying to expand the altar. So I have things to keep me busy. We talk on phone almost every day. It is okay once it is the work of God. The only way I will kick against it is when I know hems deviated from the work and goes to another place. But I trust him; I know that he is focused. And wherever he is, I know that he is preaching the gospel.

Was there any time in particular you thought of leaving him because of the challenges in the ministry, and what the press wrote against him?
No time. Because I have always been a strong and stubborn person, nothing moves me. I have always grown up to know that in life, not everybody will love you. And if you are not making an impact, people will no talk about you. Even if they write anything in the sky, I have vowed that I will serve God. And I have vowed that I will stand by him, and I meant it.
They have written stupid things. There was a time they wrote that he bought meat from a meat seller for five hundred naira because I refused to pay.
So when I saw it, I started laughing. You know at times maybe when I am in a salon or in a shop and I will see magazines even with our photographs. I will see it and I will say ah!. Such things don't bother me. What bothers me is what God thinks of me. Even if somebody comes to me and says, I saw pastor with a woman up stairs, which I know he would not because he cherishes deliverance.
If somebody comes to tell me that, and I go up and really see a woman, I will not even let anybody know, I will say please come out and go and nobody will hear it, because I am not going to be a stumbling block to the work of God. I have told God please help me, because it is easy to say, so that I don't fall, but help me I am determined that I will go all through. Even if they catch him tomorrow that he is an armed robber. I will stay with him. Especially since Jesus is alive. I have decided that I will preach the gospel till I die. By His grace.

In the history of Revival Assembly then, has never been any friction between you and papa that we know, what has been the secret?
First of all, I have always tried to be under him. People might look at me, and my countenance and say this woman is the one running this ministry. I have always believed that as a woman apart from being a servant of God, you are under a man, and I see him as my head, I might be very functional, there is nothing I really set out to do that will affect the ministry that I will not ask him. He has given me freehand. Though the bible says we are equal, but I have always seen him as my head. I have always seen him as a man God called and I am helping. Do you understand! So, that has helped in a number of ways. I am nol competing with him.
Several times he had told me start up this. People have come saying, "You have healing ministry you have this you have that I know they are coming genuinely, but I have looked at it. I don't want to start up something first of all without him acknowledging it.
But anytime he is not around, and I am alone in the ministry, I feel I am not complete. But anytime he comes back, immediately when he climbs the stairs, I will say ah baby, thank God you are back There is this fullness, there is this confidence, that the person that God has called, the person that has this greater knowledge has come. It waS from this man that I learnt how to pray. And naturally I am not a loose person; I am naturally a home person. If not that I am in the ministry, I would have loved to be a housewife, just sitting inside the house and cooking for my husband, taking care of my home, decorating my home. Even when he was going Oil air, I told him don't bring me out o! (Laughs) I will not come out until God says so. That has helped. Right now I am fixing the altar. Before he left he said baby, why don't you change this altar. I know the things he likes. When I do them, it keeps the marriage blissful.
I know he loves good environment and I make sure I keep the house clean. Not necessarily that the things there are expensive. I could get a fabric of five naira and just sit down and stitch it together. I studied him and I know where to get him. I am not doing this as if I am the General Overseer but knowing that these are the things he would want done, I do them. I think that has helped in a way. And another thing, I am a very secretive person. I might be laughing, chatting but I could keep a lot of secret. If there is anything going on in my home that is not pleasant, you will not hear it from me. You can guess, anything you hear people saying, is speculation; you can't hear it from me.
You know sometimes men cannot hold back themselves. Probably through his expression or he mentions it to somebody but me, even my mother think I have the best marriage in the world. You see I believe even before I met Christ that sharing your problem with the third party is just blowing your marriage. But in all, I give God all the glory because He gave me that wisdom.
There will be times that there will be problems. But there have never been a time that I will go on the pulpit and say "idiot, don't listen to him 0". "Look at him after three kids, this man is doing another thing" .You know I am a practical person. There will be times you will have problems. A man of God said I have never quarreled with my wife, it is a lie. You will quarrel. Earlier on when we used to have friction (but now I thank God, that as it is getting late, it is getting better). When I come to
church the love of God will just take over me and I will dance and dance, and when we get home he will say, "when we got to church you were dancing"(laughs ).

What are your expectations for this ministry in the years ahead?
I expect that God will really change the lives of people and carry everybody along to the place he has purposed them to be. That the anointing of God should be more. And we that are preaching the gospel and him (Apostle) that God has called will decrease and God will increase in his life. I know that as God increases in his life and God is seeing as the gospel is preached, lives will be touched. That is my expectation.

What is that unique quality in apostle that has being able to move a ministry of J 8 years to its present level?
You know, I think dedication, is one. Secondly, when he puts his hand to do something, he does it with all he has. And when he gave his life to Christ, he truly gave his life to Christ. And he vowed to do whatever the bible says irrespective of who he hurts. I know that God sees his heart, and because he sees his heart, he blesses the ministry. And the compassion he has for God is so enormous that it has great impact on the people.
And you know God has to see that you really want to work for Him. And when He sees that, I believe that He will equip you, and bring choice people to help you run the ministry. And I just think that is what is happening. This man is not fake he is real. A wife should be able to tell you about the husband more. And he is somebody that is very straightforward. If he was doing any other thing rather than this I will back out and if people come I will tell them that I am backing out because this is not God. Because I know that God cannot be mocked. This man loves God.
And you know several times, I told him baby if I leave you, you will sleep in church. Even when something happens like if my parent or his parent's are ill, the first thing you will see him do, is not to panic he goes into the prayer room.
So I learnt that it is only prayer that keeps him. God has checked me out I am doing the best I can. I don't party, not because partying is wrong, I don't keep friends per se. I don't go out. It is just from home to ministry, I am not bored. I am not saying that I live in the presence of God 24 hours. I do other things. I watch television. I live like every other person. That might be the thing that He saw and says I see the intents of the hearts, and I see that vision of this people. I see where they are going, I see they want to change and impact lives. I believe everything is God as you said. But you know God looks at the heart. He knows what your aims are, He knows your motives. If they are right or wrong. So if it is wrong He will not bless it, it will not last, but if it is right God blesses it even when half of the church says they are going, half will say they are staying because it is God.

Papa is 50 and he is looking younger than his age what is the secret?
I must say it is the grace of God. God is trying to make him youthful, trying to keep him the way he is so that he will be able to function properly. Because at times when we look at ourselves we begin to think of age. I remember two, three years ago, I could jump. At times I tell people I am hitting 50 myself and they say no, you don't look it.
I think age is in the heart and in the mind and when you begin to act your age, you cannot function properly. So I think that is what has kept him and God has decided to keep him that way. Because if you are fifty and you begin to act 50, you will become 55 and if you are 55 and you begin to act 55 you become hundred.

After preaching powerful sermons and he is physically exhausted, how do you help him regain strength?
When he comes in, (not every time), and we go to the inner room. I know he is tired, I pull his shoes. That place is not a place people enter anyhow. So it is like private. I try to tell him the sermon today was good. At times we try to analyze and we laugh. You know at times he will preach and he will take somebody's scarf, and will use it to preach. I will say "baby you are crazy" You used somebody's scarf and he will laugh.

But after that I will give him food. We laugh, we chat and that is it. You know we are pastors and I think we are in love and we don't carry Christianity into other areas. The normal thing any other woman will do is what I do.

You have a good dress sense just like Apostle, are you in charge of his wardrobe?
Well yes, when you love a man, you complement what he is wearing, if what he is wearing is not really good.
And one thing he does right from when we got married is to always ask, "Baby is this fitting". "Does this match".
Anywhere he is going even if he is going down the road and he puts on his shirt, he will ask "baby is this alright" and I do ask him the same question. So, it has become a part of us to ask is it okay, is it nice? I start thinking of what to wear to church on a friday. Because it is like when people go to party thinking about what they will wear not to show off per se. But saturday afternoons, I bring out what I will wear: the shoes, jewelry, everything. He learnt this from me.
So, every friday, or saturday, you see him bring out his shirt, trousers etc. But before, on Sunday morning he will ask me, baby does this match? I will say please always bring out your things before Sunday because when I am dressing up that is when he will ask. So he got used to it. He always brings them out. On Friday or Saturday his cloths will be hanging and when I look at them, I may say baby this one does not match. At times he disagrees. No baby look there is brown, there is pink, there is this or that. We will then agree. I would not say I am in charge of his wardrobe, but I complement his dressing.