I was engaged to a brother for a period of 3 years. During which I faced a serious sexual pressure. I persistently declined. This and some other factors, such as his nonchalant attitude towards me and the relationship, made us break up the relationship. One of the problems was he was double dating.

At some point, I tried evaluating the entire journey with him, to find out my areas of shortcomings.  I found out that I did put in all, except yielding to his sexual urges and advances. I felt drained emotionally. I think i really tried making the relationship work. I eventually got involved with another person. Note, both are Christians. The same was the story.

I read your article titled 'How to know if your man really loves you or not' the latter was a replica of the article. These two people usually start on a pleasant ground.

1. WHY this sexual pressures from Christians?
2. I have asked myself if i have a ‘seducing spirit', that most men seek only that from me.   
3. Do I also deserve unconditional love as i offer them.

Right now, my life hurts so badly. Who do I trust? I know I can trust God. If I am 22years of age I would have taken a 5year break but I am not.

These two people cannot be called wrong, 'cause they are good in there own respects, but what about the 7 years wasted in between these two? 
I pray for God's healing, I am not too sure I can love anyone as I have with these two especially the latter.
Is anything wrong with me, what COULD i have been doing  wrongly?

 Yours,
Adeola.

Response from Rev. Mrs Nike Adeyemi

Hi Adeola,
Noting is wrong with you. You only need to be careful as a child of God. Listen, Marriage is more than what people see it to be. It is about one's life. Before giving in to any brother, you really need to pray and let your Pastor pray along with you in chosen a right partner.

If you are living a holy life, God will reveal your husband to you, and even when God did, you should be careful in being with him behind close doors. The devil is so cunning and can use any occasion like that to tempt both of you. Watch the way you dress each time you visit or he visits you. All those little little things can make men to demand for sex.

Remember, the Christian brothers are also human beings and because they have been preserving themselves for long, if they come across whom to marry, they tend to be eager to settle down and and enjoy this aspect of life in marriage. The Lord will see you through. You will never fall into a wrong hand in Jesus name. Be prayerful, live a holy life and seek guidance from Ministers of God. Shalom!

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